Nice Kitty Soft Kitty

Went to Target and saw these on the clearance rack. Shocking, no? I asked Duncan to try them on, seeing as they matched his sneaks, and he said no. What a hater.  I mean, who doesn't need a nice pair of shiny, stretchy pants with cats on 'em? Please note the whiskers on the crotch area. I didn't see those at first glance, but my cousin Jennifer's keen eye picked up on it.  Time for a shave, pantaloons.

Now I'm no fashionista and I'm sure no designer. I'm not into the low rider jeans (no one needs to see that) and I wouldn't say you'd run to me for advice on what's hip. But I have yet to find a person who saw these pants and said "Oh yeah, I gotta have those." And from what I gather, Target hasn't either because this wasn't the only pair on the reduced rack. So I ask you this. What exactly went on in the purchasing department for ladies clothing? Are you telling me that someone rolled out a bolt of this fabric and someone else said "Oh HELL yeah, we gotta get some of those made into pants, STAT!" And why not pants that weren't super tight? Imagine these in an XL.  Do you even want to see that print on an XL ass? No, you do not. You don't want to see it on a S, M, or L ass, so there ain't no WAY you want to see it on an XL ass. And it's not like you are ever invited to an ugly pants party. Ugly sweater, yes. Ugly pants? No. Although if you did get invited to one, you'd be set with this beast.

And not for nothing, but the day that I saw these pants in the store? The day the Target CEO went bye bye. Just sayin'

Roar.