Friday, January 19, 2007

AOL Radio Featuring (((XM)))

So I've been listening to the AOL Radio, on accounta I still didn't cancel my AOL subscription, and now I'm starting to wonder if Ishould because damn, this radio is good. I have five stations in my presents

XM 80's
XM 90's
90's Country
90's Pop
Top Pop

I used to have All Pearl Jam in there but they were always playing songs I didn't know, so I put the country in, cause I never listen to country now, but I did in the 90s when I was working at the Wegmans and I listen and think "OMG I loved that song!"

In any case, I listen to the XM 80's and 90's most, with the country in a close 3rd. I have heard some dandies over the last few weeks, which I will share with you here.

This is How We Do It by Montell Jordan: Ahh, let us rewind to 1996. I can taste the Light Tacos from Taco Bell right now. I bet you forgot they had those! Well they did. They had chicken and some red sauce and I don't think they had cheese or lettuce, but maybe. They were GD good. We would go to the Wegman's softball games, stop at the Taco Bell on the way back and sit in the Appletree Mall parking lot eating the "Light" Tacos, then I think we used to throw the garbage out the window, but maybe not in that lot, maybe on a side road. Boy, I was immature. In any case, we used to listen to this song, and drive around saying "I got the money, 100 dollar bills ya'll." Which sure was the case back then when I was working three jobs and lived at home. Now I got no 100 dollar bills. If I see someone with a hundred dollar bill (ya'll) I say "OMG dude, how did you get that??" Cause let's face it, who uses cash these days?

Return of the Mack by, um, I don't know: See above because we also listened to this song. I remember I got the CD single (It could also probably be the "Greatest Hits" for the dude who sang it) and I gave it to a friend to borrow and she returned it without the case. Yeah, cause that does me a whole lot of good.

If You Leave by OMD: I learned something when this song came on. I learned that OMD stands for Orchestral Manoeuvres In The Dark (Yes, that is how they spelled Maneuvers) and I immediately emailed Little Jeff because I knew he'd appreciate it. Of course he emailed me back but I didn't get the message cause all the emails going to my account are getting returned to people as undeliverable. But I digress. The other thing I learned is that I still think of little Molly Ringwald in her little pink dress when I hear this song. I think of how cute Little Andrew McCartney was. And I think of how they probably broke up a few weeks later cause while it's nice that Andrew told off BLANE (the major appliance), kids in high school are so effing fickle I'm sure he couldn't take the heat, dumped Molly and went back to banging the popular girls.

Sailing by Christopher Cross: I learned something about this song too. I hate it.

Breakfast at Tiffany's by Deep Blue Something: Let it be known I had to look up the singer because I had no idea who it was. People, let's be honest. This is probably the dumbest song written. They have nothing in common except Breakfast at Tiffany's. Well it's time to break up then. It can't last if you have nothing in common. I know opposites attract, but you'll eventually go crazy if you can't agree on anything. Like Paul and I both agree that Friends is very funny. And we both like Bison Dip. And we both dislike brussel sprouts. As you see, it takes more than just a movie to keep couples together.

2 Legit 2 Quit by MC Hammer: My favorite part of this song (besides the heeey heeeeey by the lady in the background) is that it's got 2's in the Title instead of "Too" and "To." That Hammer. Always proving how dumb he is.

Scar Tissue by the Red Hot Chili Peppers: This is how much of a loser I am - it was on 90s Pop and I just came around to knowing that song in 2004. I thought it came out in like 2003 or something. And I remember I had no idea what he was saying when he was talking about the birds and the lonely view. I think it's about drugs!

Joyride by Roxette: Oman, Roxette. Dare I say I miss them? I enjoy the Joyride, I enjoy the It Must Have Been Love and most of all I enjoy Dangerous. Not so much a fan of Fading Like a Flower, but whatever, you can't please everyone. Having recently learned that they make a Greatest Hits Album, I reviewed the list of songs and decided to save my money and buy the two songs I like off ITunes.

Fancy by Reba McEntire: If you have never heard this song, well get off the stick and listen to it. What a hoot! I still remember the first time I heard it. I was working at Wegmans and heard the song and thought "Oh, what a nice little song about a girl who picked herself up off the ground and make something of her life." The song tells the story of a poor mother and her two kids, Fancy and the kid known as "the baby." Well Fancy turns 18 and her mama puts her in a "red satin dancing dress," throws some rouge on her and gives her some high heels. There is a line in there about just being nice to the gentleman and they'll be nice to you. So I'm like "Oh, she's a dancer!" Well I'm telling my friend Amy about this and she's like "She's a hooker!" Yeah, the dress had a slit up the side "clean up to Reba's Hip" and did I mention that a roach crawled over the toe of her high heeled shoe? Yes, the mother was desperate, so as soon as the girl was legal she sent her off to make some money. Well Fancy sure did make some money. Welfare took the baby and mama died but Fancy did well for herself, landing all these men who took her as their personal slave but who cares cause she's got the mansion and townhouse! My favorite line of the song, and I know I'm not alone on this, is "I might have been born just plain white trash, but Fancy was my name."

Too bad my mother named me Lori. And I don't have a baby brother or high heeled shoes cause maybe I could write a song about my life.

Oh, and did I mention that the mother had a baby but Fancy was 18? Hello - did that mother not learn to keep her legs closed? Well I guess not!