Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Coffee Saga Continues

So I got up late the other day and didn't have time to make my coffee. And I was like "Oh, guess I gotta go to Hortons," which I really didn't want to do because the line there at 8:50 a.m. at the one on Clinton and Harlem is quite the spectacle. The lot is super small, there are never spaces, and the drive through lane starts right off the Harlem entrance, and since I use the Clinton Entrance, you can just imagine that they don't like letting people in... I almost got into a fight with someone in the car once. The fight would have been us pointing fingers and yelling, but still, I don't like that in the morning. So I'm driving to work and I'm like "McDonalds, yeah, McDonalds!" It's cheaper and they just changed their coffee. Perfect.

Now remember the problem I had with them before? I was CERTAIN I would have a problem this time, as I've seen the signs everywhere saying that they mix it for you. So I got my large, pulled around, paid, then went to the 2nd window. And the man reached out and handed me - dadadadat du da - three things of creamer, followed by my coffee. A look came over my face, and seeing as I wasn't in front of a mirror, I can't tell you what it looked like, but I sure hope it conveyed confusion to the man. However, I don't think he cared, since he was the same one who had taken my money at window 1, then he ran up to window 2. So my question is - are they supposed to mix it? What gives??? Why can't they make up their minds. It would probably be cheaper for them to mix it, those little creamers can't be cheap, compared to a gallon of the half and half. And so, the question lingers. If you are reading this, and you know someone who works at the McDonalds, can you find out what their scheme is???

I have some other exciting things to post soon. I went to travelocity and got a big old HOOT out of the comments some of the people made about their hotel experiences. I can't wait to look at cities other than Vegas, I bet there are some good comments about the hotels in NYC!

Thursday, March 16, 2006

Ho Hum...Until the Grapes Came Out

So today was shaping up to be a day like many others. Nothing really new, just working, emailing, meetings, etc. And then, the grapes came out of the bag. I got these grapes last night at the Wegmans - they were on sale, 1.99 a lb. Well, maybe not that big of a sale, but I like them and I figured I'd buy some. So I'm at my desk about an hour ago and decide to bust them out of the bag and eat some. I didn't wash them either - what a rebel I am! Anyway, I'm eating eating, whatever, dootie doo. So Jeff comes in and I'm pulling grapes out of the bag and some of them are huge. And then, the mother of all grapes came out of the bag. This thing is HUGE. I'm talking huge. I never saw a grape so big. So it was on my desk and I called in a woman to look at it, and she said "wow, that is big!" Then another woman said "are you sure that's a grape?" Then I told this other woman "dude, the biggest grape in the world is in my office," whilst down by the copy machine, and someone overheard and thought I was nutty, but it's true. This thing must have been treated with the cow growth hormone or something. So I decided it wasn't entertaining anyone whilst sitting on my desk so I took it out for a tour of the building - something of a "traveling exhibit." Everyone agreed "I never saw one so big." Another person said "are you sure that isn't a tomato?" and I said "but of course not, it was in my grape bag." I'm putting a picture here for proof. I have displayed the Bovine Grape along with a normal size grape. Many will note that the height might not be that much (close to an inch) compared to a normal grape, but please note the width, which is over an inch at the thickest part.

While taking these pictures JB noted that we must be really bored if this is what we are doing at 4:20 in the afternoon and he is right, but you know what? If I hadn't taken these pics I would tell you all about this giant grape one day and you would just say "Wow," but not really know the MAGNITUDE of this monster. I can't bring myself to eat it because it's like a show pony now. Maybe I'll get a little glass case, like they put Elvis's partially eaten porkchop in (you know like on the Golden Girls?) That's what I'm talking 'bout!

P.S. I ate so many of the other grapes I think I'm gonna vom...

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

News I'm Sad About

I just read this article and learned that Peter Tomarken, who hosted Press Your Luck, died in a plane crash. I don't know why I'm so upset, but I really am. Maybe cause I loved that show, maybe cause I just thought people like him go off and lead long lives before they die at 90 and when they do die people like me (who will be 60 by then) will be like "Oh sonny, I remember that show, no whammy's no whammy's, stop."

Very sad day - very sad.

Monday, March 06, 2006

Where Are My Friends?

I am beginning to worry about two of my friends as they must be either:

1. Maimed (perhaps due to their poor survival skills, as show on this test.)


2. Very mad at me.

If your initials are CJG or DMC, I command you email me right now!

All the rest of you are good, you don't ignore my emails and pleas! Maybe cause YOUR sister's weren't in KMart Commercials and you feel you can still be my friend! Or maybe cause even though your super smart and get your picture in the Bee Group Newspaper, you still come down from on high to mingle with the commoners (like me.)

Miss you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thursday, March 02, 2006

This Is Worth 3 Minutes Of Your Time

Can you tell I'm going through my favorites? I had to post this video link, becuase I just watched it again after a few months and it's still funny. Not laugh out loud and call people in the room funny, but mildly funny and more funny if you think that maybe this kid has no idea this is up on someone's website!

Click Here

P.S. It finally stopped snowing at 5 p.m.!


Look what they make!!

They make "I Can't Quit You" Bears - just as cute and fuzzy as the "Shit Bitch, You Is Fine" and the "Let's Get Busy" Bear!

I must have this!!!

New Month, Newly Ripped Off Template

So it's March now, and I decided to spice things up by changing the look of Dude, WTF. I like the darker color and the dots, but part of me feels bad that I don't have the skill to make up a blog all my own, like choosing the backgrounds and the layout and such. I had a hard enough time trying to put in the links to other people's sites, and I had to ask for help on how to put an extra space in between the links and that Powered by Blogger logo down there. But I'm sure there are some other losers out there who use the canned Blog artwork, right? Please tell me there are other losers out there.

It's snowing like an Em Effer today. It let up before, but from what I can tell it hasn't stopped the whole day. And since I never pay attention to the weather reports I had no idea this was coming. Luckily it's not that cold. Maybe I can trick someone into brushing off my car. I can say "isn't this your car?" and after they brush it off I'll say "psych, this is my car" and jump in and drive away. But that might not work unless I tell them to try out my snowbrush, which I don't think anyone would want to do. But maybe they would if I tell them it was used by someone famous, like the Pope. I can say "the Pope blessed this on his very last day of blessing things. Before he passed. Before his time." And then they might get fooled! I'll continued to work on my strategy in preparation for the next big snow day.

I want pizza for dinner! A nice buffalo chicken calzone would be delicious too, but the last time I got boned, they gave me a side of red sauce instead of a side of bleu cheese. How they gonna play me like that? I'm a loyal Picasso's customer!

On a side note, my phone has been ringing off the hook today. Don't people ever go home early anymore when it snows???