Thursday, March 16, 2006

Ho Hum...Until the Grapes Came Out

So today was shaping up to be a day like many others. Nothing really new, just working, emailing, meetings, etc. And then, the grapes came out of the bag. I got these grapes last night at the Wegmans - they were on sale, 1.99 a lb. Well, maybe not that big of a sale, but I like them and I figured I'd buy some. So I'm at my desk about an hour ago and decide to bust them out of the bag and eat some. I didn't wash them either - what a rebel I am! Anyway, I'm eating eating, whatever, dootie doo. So Jeff comes in and I'm pulling grapes out of the bag and some of them are huge. And then, the mother of all grapes came out of the bag. This thing is HUGE. I'm talking huge. I never saw a grape so big. So it was on my desk and I called in a woman to look at it, and she said "wow, that is big!" Then another woman said "are you sure that's a grape?" Then I told this other woman "dude, the biggest grape in the world is in my office," whilst down by the copy machine, and someone overheard and thought I was nutty, but it's true. This thing must have been treated with the cow growth hormone or something. So I decided it wasn't entertaining anyone whilst sitting on my desk so I took it out for a tour of the building - something of a "traveling exhibit." Everyone agreed "I never saw one so big." Another person said "are you sure that isn't a tomato?" and I said "but of course not, it was in my grape bag." I'm putting a picture here for proof. I have displayed the Bovine Grape along with a normal size grape. Many will note that the height might not be that much (close to an inch) compared to a normal grape, but please note the width, which is over an inch at the thickest part.

While taking these pictures JB noted that we must be really bored if this is what we are doing at 4:20 in the afternoon and he is right, but you know what? If I hadn't taken these pics I would tell you all about this giant grape one day and you would just say "Wow," but not really know the MAGNITUDE of this monster. I can't bring myself to eat it because it's like a show pony now. Maybe I'll get a little glass case, like they put Elvis's partially eaten porkchop in (you know like on the Golden Girls?) That's what I'm talking 'bout!

P.S. I ate so many of the other grapes I think I'm gonna vom...


Anonymous said...

From the brain of JB:

Things overheard on Lori's wedding night:

"I never saw one so big."

"Are you sure that isn't a tomato?"

"But of course not, it was in my grape bag."

Anonymous said...

best regards, nice info
cash advance annuity best+price+viagra mayaguez hotels flat screen tv 28 cartridge hp ink ab ball exercise fitness tire studs removal tool low income apartment atlanta goergia direct merchant online credit card payment web design graphic fitness model weight toyota